Showing posts with label In The Kitchen. Show all posts
Showing posts with label In The Kitchen. Show all posts

Saturday, February 23, 2008

On Being Angry and Staying That Way

Things you will need:




What to do:





On Washing the Dishes While Contemplating Past Actions With Regret

Handle each item one at a time with utmost care.



Each item is a diplomat who can travel through the time space continuum to make amends for your past deeds.



Use a soft bristled brush for delicate cleaning of difficult objects.



Inspect each piece in natural bright light before continuing with another.

On How to Burn Water

Fill a large pot with water.



Place on stove and set fire setting on "High".



Call your mother, father, closest friend, relative, spouse, or significant other; and inform them that you have changed your sexual orientation, you are leaving everything behind, and are taking a new husband/wife/life partner that person has never met before. Follow up every question with a reciprocal question and fall into a twisting ontological discourse on desire and happiness.



Once you are done, your water should be fully burned.

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